~Written the same day as the excerpt below, just a few hours later, before you walked back into my life~
Yoga Girl-it's been a wacky year since I first got involved with yoga. Never would I have imagined that the idea of hot yoga would ultimately become a new passion and a new way of looking at myself. Unfortunately, the more involved I become, the more I push away other aspects of my life...and embrace other opportunities of happiness.
E has become a back burner and through so much frustration and confusion and mess, we have split up...
If I would have known what I know now about why he had temporarily split with me back in June, there is no question I would have never have forgiven him and I could be in a different place in my life right now. Just to catch you up to speed, he had sexual relations with one of MY friends because she mislead him into thinking I was betraying him, in other words, she was a jealous bitch, reminding me of a single white female syndrome.
Anyway, my heart is still bitter because of it; life has a funny way of opening up your heart and a way of shutting it off from the world. How dubious one can be to let your heart fall for just one person...but yet I do feel like I belong to just one man..I wonder if we can get back what we lost...
I'm going back to Seattle soon to take an infamous G class and have some fun, enjoy a relaxing weekend holiday with a fun road trip along the way.
Doors are opened and my mind feels exposed to so many people that come in and out, with some of these folks it feels like a swinging door and with others it's a door that refuses to close, and through it, it hard to predict who will stick around and who won't.
_________________________________________________________
.....Update: E and I managed to get back together by December, our hearts were just too strong to stay away from one another, I never went to Seattle and I permanently cut ties with G for I realized we were either never on the same wavelength or that tide had passed (or door, however you want to interpret it).. and shortly after I wrote that last line as I was sitting at a local juice bar waiting for my yoga class to begin, I saw his red and white runners from the corner of my eye walking towards the entrance of the shop...F. My heart was still feeling the sting of what it felt like to be some one's mistress but he acted like we hadn't skipped a beat and so instead of feeling begrudged, I embraced him.
From that point on I could not keep my mind off of him; his smile, his voice, his hands holding me tenderly, the way he rumbled his mouth, shrugged his shoulders and said 'I don't know sweetie' when I asked how he was doing, his lips on mine, his tongue searching my mouth for pleasure, when he laughed at the most unexpected times, sometimes I wonder though if he was laughing at me or just briefly happy.
Yoga Girl-it's been a wacky year since I first got involved with yoga. Never would I have imagined that the idea of hot yoga would ultimately become a new passion and a new way of looking at myself. Unfortunately, the more involved I become, the more I push away other aspects of my life...and embrace other opportunities of happiness.
E has become a back burner and through so much frustration and confusion and mess, we have split up...
If I would have known what I know now about why he had temporarily split with me back in June, there is no question I would have never have forgiven him and I could be in a different place in my life right now. Just to catch you up to speed, he had sexual relations with one of MY friends because she mislead him into thinking I was betraying him, in other words, she was a jealous bitch, reminding me of a single white female syndrome.
Anyway, my heart is still bitter because of it; life has a funny way of opening up your heart and a way of shutting it off from the world. How dubious one can be to let your heart fall for just one person...but yet I do feel like I belong to just one man..I wonder if we can get back what we lost...
I'm going back to Seattle soon to take an infamous G class and have some fun, enjoy a relaxing weekend holiday with a fun road trip along the way.
Doors are opened and my mind feels exposed to so many people that come in and out, with some of these folks it feels like a swinging door and with others it's a door that refuses to close, and through it, it hard to predict who will stick around and who won't.
_________________________________________________________
.....Update: E and I managed to get back together by December, our hearts were just too strong to stay away from one another, I never went to Seattle and I permanently cut ties with G for I realized we were either never on the same wavelength or that tide had passed (or door, however you want to interpret it).. and shortly after I wrote that last line as I was sitting at a local juice bar waiting for my yoga class to begin, I saw his red and white runners from the corner of my eye walking towards the entrance of the shop...F. My heart was still feeling the sting of what it felt like to be some one's mistress but he acted like we hadn't skipped a beat and so instead of feeling begrudged, I embraced him.
From that point on I could not keep my mind off of him; his smile, his voice, his hands holding me tenderly, the way he rumbled his mouth, shrugged his shoulders and said 'I don't know sweetie' when I asked how he was doing, his lips on mine, his tongue searching my mouth for pleasure, when he laughed at the most unexpected times, sometimes I wonder though if he was laughing at me or just briefly happy.
